I’m so sorry I broke up with you a couple years ago. It was a mistake, and I realized it not long after. That other guy, he made himself so tempting, the Carrier promised me all sorts of good things if I left you for him.
He wasn’t all he was cracked up to be. But I was committed by then and you know how it goes, I had to stay, you know, for the bills. The bills just weren’t ready for me to leave. So I hung in there the best I could. He wasn’t a bad guy, just the wrong guy. He was nice and all so I don’t want to say anything bad about him but, like I told the Carrier when I called the other day, it just wasn’t love like it was with you, Samsung. There were issues. Nothing I couldn’t handle, but I confess, I sort of resented having to handle them, especially when I’d never had those issues when I was with you the first time.
So, I just waited. The Carrier told me that once the bills were ready, I could switch back, and that finally happened! The Carrier agreed to dissolve my relationship with the other guy and today I signed into my Samsung account and it’s like you never left, like you’ve been waiting patiently for me this whole time. And I can see you’ve been working out because you’re much nicer than you were when I left, and you were pretty buff back then. Woo!
It’s good to be home, Samsung. I’ve missed you. I won’t leave anymore. I learned my lesson.